All Joy and No Fun

I found this article recently printed in the New York Magazine about how having children makes you less happy.

It is hard to disagree with their scientific studies, and there are pieces that I completely agree with. All in all, I thought it was a pretty interesting read.

I've only been a mom for a touch over 3 months and although my little man makes me happy as can be and I love doing things with him, there are times when I feel like he is such a joy, but parenting is no fun. Those moments mostly revolve when I'm washing bottles for the umpteenth time of the day...

The one part I strongly agree with is that the societal demands of America have made parenting a job. Even though everything you read when you are pregnant (and even after) says not to compare your child to others because all children develop at their own rate, it quickly goes out the window once you start parenting. We are a competitive society. You want the best kids and you want to be the best parent. I love talking, singing, and playing with Jacob but, sometimes it does feel like a job since I'm constantly thinking of what to do next and how it will help him instead of simply having fun with it.

The article also mentions that parents spend more time with their children now then they did in 1975 and have less free time. Although parents crave more free time they still feel like they don't spend enough time with their children or do enough for them. I understand this, and have had long conversations with Michael about how I hate that I only have about 3 waking hours with Jacob every week day, but I don't (yet) feel the need for more free time. Michael and I have made a point to still have time to relax together once Jacob is asleep and we've been on several date nights. As long as we keep that up I think all will be good on that aspect.

Michael and I pretty much got our partying done in college and once we started dating easily transitioned through time into homebodies. One of our favortie things to do is have friends over for game nights and family functions. Because of this, having a child is not too much of a life change for our social life.

Also we are both kids at heart. Even before having a kid I can't count how many visits we've made to Toys R Us and the toy department of Target. We took our niece to the Children's Museum mostly for our enjoyment. And we know our park and the playground equipment on it better than any family with three kids in the neighborhood. In fact, for my birthday last year Michael took me to the circus. At this stage in Jacob's life we can't really do all these things with him, but the anticipation is killing us and it definitely won't be a chore to tote him to the zoo, museums or splash parks, it will be the highlight.